How can this be ... ?

Now that the dust has begun to settle a bit and life is returning to "normal," I am realizing my parents aren't coming back. It's difficult to imagine 46 years of life with my parents — and now, I'll be doing life without them.

I'm not liking that thought at all, and I've been struggling with it. Thoughts of moving on bring on the tears. Yes, I have plenty to keep me busy and plenty to live for.  I have lots of things I am excited to tackle and places I want to travel.

I am at a place in my life where I know how to appreciate and enjoy what I've got, where I've been, what I've been through and all that other mess. 

It's all good.

Except ... my parents are gone.

I look at pictures of them, both recent and when they were young, and I think, "Really? Just like that, in the blink of an eye, your role in this life is over."

I don't like that thought. But I do take comfort in knowing legacies and memories exist and move forward with us.

It's just our job as friends and families to keep our loved ones alive. We must never stop thinking about them. Never stop sharing them with others. Never stop talking to them or looking for them in "signs" around you. Then life can go on without them ... just different.

Mom was so sweet during her illness, when she wasn't
anxious or afraid we were leaving her.

How can this larger than life man be gone?

So very sweet.