Teebox, part 7: "A Lot to Live Up To" & "Golf Partners"

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing the final two parts of the story. It has been in typing his story that my dam of tears have broken loose. I suppose my grieving must begin. 

Luke 11:9-10 — "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you." 

A Lot to Live Up To

When I tell about the things I've learned from my granddad, it is hard to sum it up in a concise way. However, this will be concise, and I will do my best to hit the important things. 


Three things I have learned are: How to think for myself and make my own decisions, how to understand personal morals, and how my granddad changed his own life. 

Jordie, with Mom and Dad at graduation in May 2013.
My parents are a HUGE reason Jordie has turned into
such a good person.

Usually I talk to Granddad about sports or things that are troubling me, whether it's about school, sports or family. He always answers with good advice and basically tells me that I need to "go with my gut" or to pray about it. If a tough decision arises, I can use one of the many coping skills he's taught me, and I can decide based on what I want to do or what's best for me; not by what others say to persuade me. 


My granddad's morals are based on the concepts of Christianity. Through this, he has become one of the most beloved people of his peers. He is widely respected and known for the way he treats others (although he will deny all of these things, being his humble self). He has taught me some of these things, and most of it, I have not yet caught a grasp of. I'll be lucky if I ever do. But because of his influence, I find myself more caring and sensitive to the things deep down inside of me.


The things he has taught me are things that he's acquired over time. There was a period in his life when he was different, to say the least.  I know from Granddad's story, changing the course of one's life is possible. *See note.

Through the years I've known my granddad, I've never really thought about these things until a few years ago. In my life, I hope to carry on his influence. Like I said, I would be lucky to be half the man he is now when I get to be 67. I believe that to be the truth.


I know it is the truth.

*NOTE: Three or so years ago, I could share details of my granddad's story for a private school assignment. While I know he never shied away from the truth about his past troubles and was always willing to help someone who might need his experience, I never knew him to share his story in a public forum — so I'm not going to do that now. All I know is that through his faith in God and his acceptance of God's grace and forgiveness in his life, he was able to change and move forward in God's will for him. Granddad adopted this biblical truth as a way of life: 

"... but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." 

— Philippians 3:13-14

Granddad would say that because God does not play favorites, then if God's grace was good enough for him, it is good enough for the rest of us. All he had to do was accept that grace and move forward — and he did. I admire and respect him for that. 

* * *

"Who can ask more from a man than giving all within his span, giving all seems to me, is not so far from victory." — George Moriarty

Golf Partners

It is the summer before my sophomore year. My granddad is among average age of most of the golfers, and I am younger than most of them, considering that I am in high school. To make up for my youthful presence on the course, I wear presentable golf attire, use my granddad's expensive hand-me-down Ping G2 clubs, and ride in the cart. We travel to the course in a red Toyota Tundra, with a new car smell and the air conditioner blasting. I seek my own approval in playing — but it is my inconsistent play that frustrates me, and because I only play golf in the summer, I am timid.

I finish that summer's worth of golf and come back for another. Granddad is an easy playing partner, always choosing me for his first choice. One day, I remember during a rushed schedule, Granddad quit playing a round of golf all together because I had to leave early.

He begins to call me his "bestest bud" the way kids of the same age address each other in his eyes. He finds humor in it.

"My bestest bud," he says, "Ya know, we can play golf together any time. It's my favorite thing in the whole world. But we don't have to if you don't want to ... Ya know I'm up for it any time."

Sometimes I have other plans. Granddad, to his delight, tries to show up to every event I have. He tells jokes instead of talking, laughs with joyfulness and delivers a little joke with a hint of seriousness; the "bestest bud" joke being a perfect example.

It cracks me up. In all the time spent with him, I realize why everyone enjoys him: He's the nicest person in the world, and he has fun showing it.

***********

Remember this your lifetime through

Tomorrow there will be more to do

With some success made yesterday

Tomorrow you must try once more

And even harder than before.

Teebox, part 6: Simple But Perfect

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing part six of this story.

Matthew 6:34 — "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Simple But Perfect

Granddad's perfect day is a simple one. He only mentioned four things. I did not expect a list of only four things, but now that I think about it, it makes sense to me. It seems it would be easier to have a simple list on a perfect day. It is perfect because there is not a lot to do. There is no stress, there could be downtime, and you can sit back and relax the day away. You can really soak up your perfect day and enjoy it when you add the simplicity to the equation. 

Dad, Jordie, and Jordie's dad, Dave Henry. This was
the day we moved Jordie into his dorm at Wayland.

The first thing that Granddad mentioned was that he wanted to play 18 holes of golf with me at the La Paloma golf course. I am well aware of the fact that he loves playing golf, and he has always harped on how much he likes playing when I am with him. Sometimes I wonder why this is, because one thing I've regretted most about the subject is my attitude on the golf course. I can be very unpleasant, to put it nicely. But, I know that Granddad enjoys the nature of being outside and playing a game he loves with his grandson. I guess when I become older, I will not take those things for granted either. 

The second and third things he listed go hand in hand with each other. He said that he would like to do good for somebody who needs it, with no expectations or favors in return. He also said that he would like to perform God's service. God's service does include doing good for people who need it.

Lastly, he said that living with God's intentions would complete his perfect day. This means praising God, living through the works of His word, and spreading His word to others. 

One thing he doesn't realize, however, is that he performs these four things on an almost daily basis, especially in the summer. In the summer is when we play golf together, because it is when I have the time to get in a round of golf. He always does good for somebody who needs it by simply putting a smile on many people's faces each and every day. By doing this, he does perform God's service. He also influences many people, including me, with God's word, which is living with God's intentions. 

In a short summary like that, I have explained his daily rituals, and I have described his perfect day, which are pretty much the same two things.

It is simply amazing. 

Next: Part 7: "A Lot to Live up to" 

Teebox, part 5: Working Through His Influence

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing part five of this story.

Philippians 4:6 — "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." 

Working Through His Influence

There are two main accomplishments that my granddad has taught me throughout my lifespan of 16, almost 17, years. The first is the ability to play sports. Being a two-time state champion basketball coach, he got me hooked on basketball from a very early age. The earliest instance I can remember of myself playing basketball was when I was in Childress, in the driveway of my great granddad, Grandaddy Wilcoxson's, house. I was throwing a little rubber ball into a Little Tikes basketball goal, made of plastic. There is even a famous picture of me doing exactly what I just described, although I really do remember it happening.

Granddad coached my club basketball teams all the way until 8th grade, right before high school. He taught me everything I know about the sport. Golf is the same way with him. He taught me how to play golf at a very early age, as well, and he really got me playing on a course at the age of 8. He has taught me that golf is a game of frustration, a game of patience, a game of hard work, and a valuable commodity for life in instances you would never think about, like business.

That red Toyota Tundra now belongs to Jordie.
This is the day granddad gave it to him,
in November.

Just recently, in the summer of 2011, I shot a 79 in Childress, of all places. It was the first time I had ever broken the score of 80 on the golf course, which is a milestone for golfers everywhere. I never would've been able to do it without him. He taught me everything I know about the sport.

The second accomplishment is the greatest. He taught me how to have a relationship with God. Now, before I go any further, I will say that nobody is perfect. I am by no means the perfect example of a Christian. But, I am a Christian, and I do talk to God. I do not care if people who are not Christians know about that. To each his own. 

However, Granddad has taught me a lot about life, and that includes God. He is always giving me advice and tips on life. He never forgets to mention the importance of the Lord in our lives, and how important it is to be involved in His teachings. Faith has gotten me through many struggles in life, especially my sophomore year. I will never forget that.

The extent of these accomplishments will help me through my entire life, for I have already figured that out for myself. 

Teebox, part 4: Cracker Barrel and the Heart-to-Heart

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing part four of this story.

"Preach the Gospel wherever you go ... and if necessary ... use words!" — St. Francis

I find myself in my granddad's red Toyota Tundra on the way to Cracker Barrel. Accompanying me is my granddad, obviously, and my grandma. It is a normal weekday on a crisp October night in Amarillo, Texas. The sun is setting and it is just barely sitting on the horizon, so it is basically dark outside. I have just been picked up from my mom's house, and I could've driven myself; however, Grandma and Granddad have insisted on chauffeuring me to dinner. They do this to spend more time with me, and I realize this.

On the way, Granddad begins his little small-talk interrogation on the present day. Usually, this is kicked off on the subject of sports, no pun intended. Today was a throwing day in my rehab program (I am recovering from a shoulder injury from baseball) and Granddad begins with questions about how my throwing went, such as the usual, "How'd the throwin' go today?" and "How many sets of throws did you end up doin'?" I reply with the usual, "It was fine," or "It was alright," and I proceed to tell him how many sets I completed.

"So your arms gettin' better, ya think?"

"Yeah, I think so. Had a little accuracy problem today, though."

Granddad chuckles and says, "So your dad had to chase down the balls today, did he?"

"Yeah, but it's because he just can't catch 'em. Well, it's both, actually."

Grandma and Granddad both laugh, and Granddad switches the subject by mentioning about how the "Cowboys found a way to lose." We talk about our distaste for Dallas and overanalyze it just like the talking heads on ESPN. Even Grandma chimes in, "Even I saw that!" and tells her side from watching it on television. Then we talk baseball because it's the middle of the playoffs and my favorite sport just happens to be baseball, so I can't control myself from talking about it. We overanalyze this, too, and our opinions usually agree. Granddad finishes the topic by announcing that "one bad thing about democracy is that the dumb-butts can have a say in whatever." 

As usual, Grandma comes back with a funny aimed at Granddad.

"Now ... by saying that, are you including yourself in the group of dumb-butts?"

The evening goes smoothly at Cracker Barrel. Granddad and I always get the Sunrise Sampler, and the day is settled.

A few days later, Granddad agrees to answer a couple of meaningful questions that I need to ask him.

My first deep question is, "What is your biggest regret in life?" 

I'm 99 percent sure that I know the answer to this; even though I've heard it only once, I have never forgotten it.

Granddad kind of hesitates and struggles to find the words, and he pauses every once in a while. "Well ...ya know ... when I was younger ... I was a workaholic ... whether it was working on the golf course or coaching basketball. I didn't have much free time, so ..." 

He takes a really long time to utter the last part, and it is a tone that is whole-heartedly confessing, "my biggest regret was not spending more time with your Aunt Kim and your mom ... That's my biggest regret."

I wait awhile for him to recover, and even act like I'm still recording what he just said to give him some time to re-gather his thoughts.

My last question is simply, "What is the purpose of life, and why are we on Earth?"

This one is easy for him ... a cakewalk compared to the last one, as he is a man of strong Christian faith. "Well, if you're a Christian, obviously your purpose is to glorify Christ and tell people about the gospel, ya know? That's the main reason we're here."

He leaves it at that, and I do, too.

Next: Working Through His Influence

Teebox, part 3: Oh What a Life!

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing part three this story.

"Oh, What a Life!"

On Nov. 15, 1944, James Marvin Klostar was born.  James was adopted by Buddy and "Pokey" Wilcoxson, who were residents of Childress. He grew up in Childress while being called "Jim" or "Jimmy." He would go on to graduate as a Childress Bobcat in 1963, being an all-state basketball player and golfer. His senior year in golf, he won a state championship. This would've never happened had Texas Tech alum Don Kaplan not moved to Childress to teach Jim the game of golf, which he instantly found a passion for.

During school, he met Nicki Sooter, whom we would later marry and go to college at Texas Tech University with. He became a Red Raider on a golf scholarship to play on the team, which was, back in the day, the Southwestern Conference. This must have been a dream come true at the time, as he has always said golf was his number one love.

Jim and Nicki had two children, both daughters, who were 4 years apart: Kim, who is now 47, and Jami, who is 43. During their growing up years, Jim behaved in ways he regrets; he's been on a good path for 30 years now.

Jim went on to become the Amarillo Country Club golf course superintendent at an early age. Jim went back to college at the age of 38 to become a basketball coach at the age of 40.

Jim recalls that the only reason he got into coaching was because his oldest daughter, Kim, had nobody to coach her third-grade basketball team. This (coaching), allergy problems from the golf course, and liking coaching in general made him want to continue to coach. 

His coaching career got underway as the volunteer assistant basketball coach for Amarillo College in 1983 under head coach Kelly Chadwick. In 1985, he received his first head coaching position at 1A Booker High School in Booker, Texas, with his youngest daughter, Jami, on the team. After one year, he moved back to Amarillo to become the head coach at Tascosa High School, and coached the Lady Rebel basketball team to its first regional tournament berth in school history. 

His most prominent tenure as a head high school basketball coach began in 1989 at the then young Randall High School, which was only two years into its existence. After three years as head of the Lady Raiders, in 1992, he coached them to a state championship ... the first basketball state title in school history. Later on in 1998, he repeated the state championship win as coach of the Randall Lady Raiders in front of his family, including his grandson (myself) Jordie. In 2004, after 15 years as the head coach, he retired. All in all, he recorded 469 career wins, 139 losses and two state championships. This would earn him a spot in the Randall Raider Hall of Fame and the Panhandle Sports Hall of Fame in 2005 as the 135th member.

Throughout this time period at Randall High School, his daughters each gave birth to one son. Jami, the youngest, gave birth to Jordan Cale Henry in 1995, and Kim, the oldest, gave birth to Cole Thomas Migliaccio in 1999.

Also throughout this time period and some years after, Jim showed his family and friends that he was a fighter and a survivor. He went through bouts of melanoma and recently survived and defeated prostate cancer. After it all, he is still "as healthy as a horse," in his terms.

After his retirement in 2004, Jim took up playing golf again and has only played "on the days that end in Y" since then. A usual group of golfing partners accompanies him on a daily basis, and it seems like he couldn't enjoy life more. In the summers, he enjoys playing golf with me, as well, as it is the only free time for golf that I have outside of school and year-round baseball.

His obsession with golf nowadays leads him to a mass purchase of golf clubs, tools, and a trillion golf hats that he gets his money's worth for. Wherever he can, he stops and makes a golf outing. Usually, it's at one of the hundreds of golf courses in the Dallas-Fort Worth region, or it is at the newly constructed Stoney Ridge Golf Club in Childress.

Still having his old touch, he consistently shoots in the low 70s and occasionally breaks 70 into the high 60s. The golf talent that he owns is almost uncanny, although he refuses to believe it because of his humble personality, always shying away from the compliments for his game.

When he isn't playing golf, he enjoys watching Cole and me play baseball on our respective teams. He also started working out several years ago for three to four days a week at Zach's Club 54. Being a licensed personal trainer, he also helps me with workouts after his own.

Throughout his life, he has always stayed strong in his faith in God, and his personality and influence on everybody shows this. Even now, church attendance and Bible study members include him.

He and his wife, Nicki (my grandmother) are two of the best people in the world, and they have been married for 46 strong, healthy years.

JANUARY 27, 2012: It was officially announced that Jim Wilcoxson will be inducted into the Texas High School Basketball Hall of Fame, along with five other members, in San Antonio, Texas. He will be inducted for his career at Randall High School, including two state titles and a playoff spot in every season he coached, and also for his short tenures at Booker High School and Tascosa High School.

Next: Cracker Barrel and the Heart-to-Heart

Teebox, part 2: "The Physical Nature"

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing part two of this story.

What I Learned From the Teebox

"The Physical Nature"

It just so happens that my granddad looks like the perfect golfer type. He is not overly built physically, but he does show the body type of a former athlete. At around 5'11" and a "fat man's gut," as he would call it (though he is not anywhere near fat), he shows the effects of a long sports tenure on a body. These effects include a curved pointer finger from being a gym rat and shooting a basketball so much, and overall good health, except for one thing: His leather-like brown skin from spending so many days in the sun as a young man, which deteriorates the protection of his skin. He bruises easily and gets small cancers sporadically. 

His attire consists of mostly two things: golf clothes, which include khaki shorts and collared shirts, and athletic shorts, t-shirts, and caps. He has kept up with the styles, sporting the longer shorts and stretchy fabric that clothes are made of nowadays. Being from Childress, Texas, he has a thick country twang accent that exits from a little gap in the top row of his teeth. This twang is used frequently on the golf course, however. The links are his place to socialize and have fun. Having fun, for my granddad, includes talking to everybody he sees.

On "the days that end in Y," he pulls up to the Tascosa Country Club parking lot in his crimson Toyota Tundra. The country club includes two golf courses: Tascosa and La Paloma, which are separated by one street. On La Paloma, you will be met by rough terrain, rolling hills, thick Texas grasses and vegetation, and narrow fairways. It is most likely the hardest course in the Panhandle, but it is by far mine and Granddad's favorite. Tascosa is La Paloma's fraternal twin. It has many trees, and thin grass. The fees for both courses are very high for guests, which keeps the courses held for its members. The club has a tennis center and a brand new pool with mini soccer fields and a grill accompanying it.

Next: "Oh What A Life!"

What I Learned From the Teebox ... by Jordie Henry

Note: My son, Jordie Henry, is now 20 years old. When he was a junior at Randall High School, he had to write a story similar to the format of "Tuesdays With Morrie," for Mr. Lance's English class. He wrote his story about his granddad, Jim Wilcoxson. 

With Jordie's permission, I am sharing this story, in parts. I think my son is a writer ...

What I Learned From the Teebox

"Sweating Out a Day in Childress, Texas"

It is the late summer of 2011, a humid, unbreathable Saturday morning. We both sit next to each other, side by side, on the white cushion of the golf cart beside the #1 tee. We wear similarly-designed golf attire. We do not have to wait on anybody. When we tee the ball up, we take our backswings, and strike the white ball into the Texas air, seemingly the only golfers on the course in the town of Childress. For both of us, a round of golf has just come underway.

Jordie Henry

On the 18th tee, I see Jim Wilcoxson, my granddad, and he congratulates me joyfully on my first round for shooting under the score of 80. He is not a shy man, for he knows everyone, as if he has connections with anybody he crosses. In his gold-collared shirt and black shorts, he still looks like a natural golfer. He has light-colored blue eyes, thinning gray hair combed across the top of his head, tanned skin, a small gap in his teeth, and a distinct smile. Although his sayings are redundant and his jokes are, too — he thinks of them on his own — when he says them, it the most amusing thing you'll hear all day because it's just plain goofy and original.

People always ask him how he's doing when he is greeted. He replies, "If I had a tail, I'd be waggin' it!" Knowing that was coming, I still smile and wait for the person's delighted reaction. Before we leave, he has to buy a souvenir (usually something for me), a white Stone Ridge Golf Course hat. I wanted to make sure it fit. It was a special occasion. We make this trip together annually.

"Jordie H. Henry, you ready to head back to Amarillo?" he asks, knowing full well my middle name starts with a C (I guess he likes the ring of the "H" sound). Then he pats me on the back. I feel like I've been playfully punched. I'm much taller than he is, but when he pats me on the back, or grabs my back with pro-wrestler-like strength, I feel like he's the bigger one.

He asks if I need "anything to eat, drink, spit, or chew," and without hesitation, I reply with a laugh, "Naw, I'm fine."

When he hears the answer, he simply steps back and laughs.


Next: "The Physical Nature"