Adventures of the Mom-included Household

Wow. What an amazing last two days. And you can bet I'm going to hold onto the goodness as if every day after those two will be just as good, if not better.

(OK, so I still need to get my nights figured out ... we'll talk about that later. I got three hours of sleep the first night, and two-and-a-half last night.)

Mom arrived about mid-morning the first day. She was calm, yet quiet, but I could tell she felt pretty content as she seemed to look around in wonderment. She knew she was at my house, with her family. First thing we did was give her the cream cheese pound cake Dorsey had made the day before. It's her favorite, and she ate two pieces. Pretty cute!

I had quite a bit of unloading and then putting things away to do, so Mom, Dad and Lucinda, our new caregiver, sat outside in the bird sanctuary — where, I might add, the doofus birds have not yet figured out they have food, so they continue to eat the cat food on the ledge.  That area is shaded, so without the usual fidgeting and anxiety, she quietly took in her surroundings.

Chloe, the other kitties and the puppies played outside, too. Mom was pleased to have Chloe back, and that afternoon, Chloe curled up in bed with her for a two-hour nap. Just like old times!

During the afternoons we don't have a caregiver, so while Mom, Dad and Chloe napped, I busied myself with laundry and making chicken pot pie for dinner. (Yes, the real deal. I'm already loving being back in the kitchen!) Kim took care of all the medication transfer things for both of my parents, which was pretty darn complicated and detailed! Still, it's all figured out and good now.

I have to say, I'm quite impressed with the video/audio monitor we have. I kept an eye on Mom while she slept, and I can hear if she happens to call out. (However, that monitor has caused me a few "issues" during the night.)

Not once during the last two days has my mom lashed out at us in anger. The only tough emotion she's expressed so far is one of feeling overwhelmed. She said several times the first day, and once during tears, "It's just too much."

When pressed for more information, we discovered she felt bad about all we were doing for her.  We assured her, as I can assure you, this is what we want to be doing. We are so glad to have her.

I have noticed that even though Mom still talks about nonsensical things, she has more lucid moments than I remember her having in a long time. She has even remembered the foods I've been making and what she is eating and wants to eat. I offered her a brownie yesterday, which I had made the night before, and she said, "Yes, I remember you made them last night before I went to bed."

Wow. That might not sound like a big deal, but it is. And Kim said Mom wanted chicken pot pie for lunch yesterday because she remembered how good it was the night before. Another wow.

Perhaps my favorite moment of all so far occurred between 12 and 1 a.m. the first night/early morning. Via the monitor, I saw Mom's restlessness and wakefulness. I went to check on her, and she said she was hurting. Her left arm almost always hurts. Sadly, while she cannot will it to do what she wants and it's a burden to her, she still can feel all the pain it has to offer.

So, I gave her medicine and wrapped her arm in a warm rice pack. We sat and talked, and I rubbed her feet, while we waited for her arm to stop hurting. Sure, I was sleepy, but I felt happy to be there. During that time, she looked at me and said, "Did you ever think you would be doing this?"

I said, "Taking care of you and Dad?" She nodded her head. I said, "No, no I did not."


And then with a brief pause, I smiled at her and said, "But I'm so glad I am. I'm so happy you are here with us now."

I meant it, and she knew it. She smiled back at me and eventually fell back asleep. Blessed moment!!

Truly, I've been sitting in gratitude for the last two days, despite lack of sleep, because I'm in awe of how well she's doing. I know I will get my nights figured out, and I will adjust to her sleeping habits. I also know we will find a routine that works well for everyone.

We definitely are using every square inch of our house, and that's great — because what are houses for? I'm spending lots of time cleaning, laundering, cooking and running errands ... but that's just running a household. As I said, we soon will settle into something pretty comfortable.

I just can't shake how blessed I feel and how much calmer Dad is. I think Kim is pretty pleased with how things are going, too.

Yesterday, Dad said, "Mom has a sparkle in her eyes again." It's true. She does.

And I know Dad is feeling better emotionally when he's calling his friends back and doing social things with them, like lunch and coffee.  In two days, he's become quite the social butterfly again.

Yes, my family suffered through an extremely long, cold, difficult winter, but our spring is here, and  summer is on it's way. I'm looking forward to this time we all have together again — like old times, only better.