Caregiving: Week One

The first week with Mom at home with us was good in many ways, but stressful in others.

It's been good because I know she's where she needs to be, but stressful because I don't function that well on little sleep. I've averaged three hours of sleep each night this past week.

The first few nights, I probably could have slept fine because Mom did. I just watched that monitor like a new mom bringing home Baby for the first time would.

After that, however, Mom had all kinds of tummy troubles, which kept us up for hours. That finally caught up with me by the end of the week, and I was quite irritable and physically achy. Thankfully, the last couple of nights have been fine, and I've been able to get a nap or two.

I'm also almost a pro at changing briefs, transferring her and all of those other technical things now. It doesn't take long from so much repetition. I'm also getting some guns on my arms! Oh, and now that Dorsey and I stay upstairs, plus the washer and dryer are up there, my legs are getting a serious daily workout.

In fact, I'm loving watching my MisFit calculate my daily points, calories and steps. Over the top — especially on the days I also run.  I'm even reaching my fitness goals on the days I don't run and lift. Too bad I'm eating like there's no tomorrow. I'm starving all the time!

For someone who has historically struggled with having people in her home — because everything might not look, be or smell okay — I think I'm doing pretty well. We have caregivers, therapists and other people in and out every day. I have my moments of, "Not again!" but I've mostly reached an, "It is what it is," attitude. (I'm referring to appointments with people who give Mom care.)

Dorsey managed to have time to get the new ramp assembled and installed while he was home, fix the broken back door and address a couple of other issues. That relieved some stress. A man named "T" is going to mow and edge for us for a nominal fee.

And one friend has worn herself out preparing food for us. It's all been pretty tasty, too. The meal train is seeing some people sign up, and that has been a great help as we focus on Mom, and because I've had an editing project this past week that has demanded my attention.


I had no idea how much work my animals were until my parents moved in, but you know what? I don't care! Those babies provide me with great joy. They are worth the work.

Still, it was extremely helpful that my stepson's mom and her husband took Indy and Koda to their house for a playdate yesterday.  It worked out well enough that they will try it again. Indy and Koda came home happy and exhausted. As it should be.

Fortunately, Kim has been here, as well. She takes care of lots of Dad's appointments, as well as caregiving. It's truly a team effort. (That also means Vince is carrying the business load at home while Kim works long-distance.) AND, Kim has to do it all while being horribly allergic to all of my animals ... <sigh>

Nothing is ever uncomplicated, is it?

Over all, I can't complain. It's hard, but it's meaningful. I've discovered I have a knack for caregiving.  I've also discovered I can mostly ask for and accept help from others. I'm finding, once again, some really great caregivers are out there. I LOVE the three or four we've got.

I still have a long way to go in chilling out and not taking things so seriously, but I'm sure I will have no choice but to get there. I won't survive if I don't.

Every day is a new day and a learning experience. I suppose that's fundamental to caregiving.